The Reason
by stardust2002
Summary: This story is about Kara and Anders' relationship and helps to explain why Lee may end up with Dee. It is mainly a Kara Anders story, but there will also be some Kara Lee and Lee Dee. Spoilers for most of season 2. NOW COMPLETE!
1. Chapter 1

The Reason

**oooooooooooooooo**

"Dradis contact," Gaeta called out suddenly, breaking the calm atmosphere in the CIC.

"Identify," Adama said tersely.

"Not sure yet ..."

"Galactica, Kat. We've got an unknown vessel approaching the fleet. Moving to intercept."

"Mr. Gaeta?" Adama questioned.

He shrugged. "Dradis is having trouble identifying it, sir."

"Dee, put out a message on all channels. See if we get a response."

"Yes sir."

"It's a cylon ship!" Gaeta interrupted. "Not a raider - larger."

Adama shot a look at Dee. She nodded - no words needed to be spoken.

"Kat, Galactica. Cylon ship approaching. Commence attack."

Just then the speakers cracked to life. "Hello? Is anyone getting this? My name is Samuel Anders, and I'm from Caprica. I know we're in a cylon ship, but me and my crew are human. Please don't shoot us down."

"What the hell ...?" Tigh exclaimed.

"Put me through," Adama demanded. "Unknown vessel, this is the Battlestar Galactica. We have ships moving to intercept. Please hold your position or we will commence shooting."

"Please don't shoot!" Anders voice was panicky. "I told you, we're human! We stole the ship and came to find you."

"How do I know you are who you say you are?"

"Let me talk to Kara ... I mean ... what the hell does she call herself again?" Adama could hear mumbling in the background. "Right, Starbuck. Can I talk to Starbuck please?" he begged.

"Hold your position till further notice." He put the phone down. "Tell the CAP to hold off firing till we check this out.' He picked up the phone again, punching the correct buttons. "Lieutenant Thrace, report to CIC _immediately!"_

It was barely two minutes before Kara came trotting into CIC, Lee in tow, both sweaty and flushed, having obviously been interrupted mid-run.

"Yes Admiral?" she asked breathlessly.

He turned a stern eye on her. "We've got a cylon heavy raider out there with a man claiming to be Samuel Anders piloting it." Her look of shock was noted - by both Adamas. "He wants to speak with you."

Kara took the phone, face paling. "Sam?" she asked hesitantly.

"Kara, is that you? Gods! It's so good to hear your voice again - please tell them not to shoot us!"

"How do I know you really _are_ Anders?" A trace of suspicion laced her voice. But Lee was an observant man - he could hear the trace of hope as well. A pain shot through his chest like a needle. _She cares for him._

"When we played pyramid together, I beat you 9 - 7 but you kept arguing one of my goals should have been kept back because I fouled you. The next morning was the most amazing se ..."

"Okay, I believe you," she interrupted, face radiating happiness. She covered the mouthpiece. "It's him," she said to Adama.

"So we should trust him?"

"Absolutely."

"I'll take care of the landing, you two go dress properly and meet me in the hangar bay in ten. I want you both as part of the welcoming party."

"Yes sir," the chorused in unison, and took off out of CIC at a run.

Exactly ten minutes later, Adama, Tigh, Lee and Kara were waiting, along with some of Tyrol's deck crew, as the ship's hatch opened and Anders descended first. A smile blazed across his face suddenly as he caught sight of Kara, and Lee gave her a sideways glance, only to discover a matching smile on her face.

"Kara!" The name tore from his lips like a dying man who just spotted water. He ignored everyone and strode straight to her, embracing her fiercely - even lifting her a little ways off the ground.

"Kara, I've missed you so," he murmured, and then their lips met. The kiss went on and on, like two people who'd been separated forever.

"Ahem," Adama cleared his throat, breaking up the lengthy kiss.

Anders let go of Kara, rather reluctantly Lee noticed, and stood facing Adama.

"Sorry sir," Kara muttered, wiping her mouth and smoothing out the front of her dress uniform.

"I see why you were so anxious to go back," he said dryly, giving her a look that spoke of conversations yet to come. Kara flushed a deep red, knowing exactly what was on his mind.

"I'm Admiral Adama, commander of this ship. Colonel Tigh, Captain Adama," he paused a moment. "And obviously you've met Lieutenant Thrace." Anders smiled at her and Adama could see why she was attracted to him. he was open, friendly, and unafraid to show his feelings. _Unlike Lee, whom she's half in love with,_ he thought. He wasn't as unobservant as people often gave him credit for - he'd known for months that Lee and Kara had been hovering at the edge of taking their relationship out of it's comfort zone and moving it forward. In fact, he'd often wondered why they hadn't yet. Now he knew - she had feelings for someone else.

"Happy to meet you people. Kara talked about you a lot and couldn't wait to come back here."

"We're happy to have her back," Adama said proudly.

"Is everyone with you?" Kara asked him. Anders just threw her a look and walked back to the ship, motioning those on board to come off.

"Twelve? That's _all?"_ she said disbelievingly after counting them.

Anders turned sad eyes towards her. "It's been tough since you left," he said gently, sorrow evident in his voice. Many of his teammates - his closest friends - had perished in the weeks since she'd left them.

Lee stole a glance at Kara. Outwardly the news hadn't seemed to affect her much - a raised eyebrow and stiffened spine - but her eyes spoke differently. He could see Anders' sorrow mirrored there, and something else - guilt.

"I should never have left you," she whispered, voice barely audible, but Anders heard her, and clasped her hand in his.

"You did what you had to do, and so did we. It's nobody's fault." She smiled weakly but Lee wasn't fooled. He'd been reading Kara long enough to know how guilt affected her - and how she tried to hide it from everyone. Idly he wondered if this man Anders knew her as well. _Well how could he? _he asked himself. _They only knew each other a few days. I've known Kara intimately for half a year already._

"I can imagine you're all weary and needing rest, so I'll let you get settled in some temporary quarters and have the chef prepare a meal for you." Adama smiled at the small crowd of refugees in front of him. Then he turned towards Anders. "I'm going to need to meet with you after that, at say, 1800hrs. Colonel, would you take care of our guests please?"

Tigh nodded. "Follow me please."

Kara turned and began to walk beside Anders, bodies touching comfortably as they moved.

"Lieutenant, a moment please?"

Kara stopped. "Of course sir." She turned and placed a hand on Anders' arm. "I'll catch up with you later."

"You sure you'll find me? This ship is huge."

"I'll find you," she said firmly, smiling widely. "I know this ship like the back of my hand."

"Good." Anders smiled warmly then followed everyone else out of the hangar bay.

"So ... Kara ... I think there's something you neglected to put in your report on your visit to Caprica." Adama's words weren't exactly accusatory but they weren't the friendly, fatherly type she was used to either.

Kara flushed again. "I didn't think my personal life was relevant to the report sir."

"Everything is relevant Kara - and it explains why you've been so determined to send a rescue party back to Caprica."

Kara glanced at Lee then flinched. His eyes were cold, glittering sapphires and his expression was angry. So, he too was angry with her for neglecting to mention Anders. _Too bad, _she thought. _It's no one's business what I do in my own time. _Her jaw hardened and the 'Starbuck' mask dropped over her features again. Adama recognized it and knew she was digging her heels in for a fight. He sighed.

"We'll continue this conversation later. You're both dismissed."

Kara nodded brusquely and stalked off. Lee lingered a moment, and Adama had the feeling he had something he wanted to say. "Something on your mind Lee?"

"Did you have _any _idea ...?" He shook his head, not quite knowing how to say what was running through his mind.

Adama shook his head as well. "Not a clue. But then again, this is Kara. She's good at hiding things she doesn't want people to know."

"The question is, _why _ doesn't she want people to know?" Lee fiddled with the wings on his uniform, something he was often wont to do when pondering something.

"Maybe a better question is, what is she going to do now that we _do _know?"

Lee nodded in silent agreement. While this new turn of events had shocked him somewhat, it did explain some of her behaviour since she'd come back. It was definitely going to be interesting to see how things played out.

**oooooooooooooooooooooo**

It didn't take Kara long to find out where the Caprica survivors had been placed. There weren't that many spare bunkrooms, despite all the losses they'd taken, so she'd found it quite easily. All twelve of them _could _have been placed in one room, but twelve was capacity and Kara knew, from hard experience, how unpleasantly crowded that was. Tigh, it seemed had been compassionate for once, and had split them into two neigbouring quarters.

"Anders?" she called out quietly, sliding the hatch open almost noiselessly - years of practicing sneaking around coming in handy.

"Hey," he said, smiling as he got up off his bunk and followed her out.

After a rather long reacquaintance kiss, they broke apart again and stood just looking into one another's eyes.

"You guys really live like sardines here huh?" he teased, trying to break the ice. The tension between them was almost tangible and it seemed neither was able to cut through it to say the things they _really _wanted to say.

"Didn't I mention your place was like a palace at some point?" she returned, smiling a thank you for easing the tension somewhat.

"Listen, didn't your Admiral say these were 'temporary' quarters? What exactly did he mean by that?"

"That you won't be staying here long I imagine."

"Where are we going to go then? He's not going to send us back is he?"

"Of course not." She ran a hand down his chest slowly, watching the muscles tense through his T-shirt as it descended. "But Galactica is a battlestar. We're a warship and there's no place for civilians here. There are over two hundred civilian ships traveling with us. I imagine he'll try to find you a home on one of them."

"But I _came _here to be with you," he objected, running a gentle hand along her cheek.

"You came here to avoid being killed. _My _being here is just an added bonus," she teased, a mischevious grin forming.

"No, I came here _to be with you_," he repeated, totally serious. "I don't know what you did to me back on Caprica, but after you left I realized that I _wasn't _ really living without you. I was surviving sure, trying to hold it all together and keep my people alive, but I wasn't living. You gave me a reason to be alive - a reason to wake up in the morning - a reason to continue the fight though the odds were horribly against us." Anders stroked her cheek tenderly. "All I've thought about since you left was you, and how I shouldn't have let you go."

"_Let _me go? You _made _ me go!"

"I know. I couldn't be selfish and ask you to stay - you belong here. You wanted so desperately to get home, I ... I just couldn't let you stay. You'd have regretted it."

"I've regretted leaving every single day since then," she whispered, putting her other hand up to join the first one on his chest. "I know I had to complete my mission, but I wanted so much to stay and fight ... with you."

"Kara," he said softly, pushing a stray lock of hair behind her ear. "We're together now. I didn't come all this way just for us to be apart again. We'll find a way to make it work." He leaned forward and kissed her softly.

"The eternal optimist aren't you?" she chuckled. " 'Lighten up, it's only the end of the world ' " she quoted him. "How can you always seem to make the best of things?"

"When I'm with you, nothing else seems to matter."

"Smooth talker too. Tell me again why I went and left you behind?" she teased.

"Some frakked up notion - I think they call it duty."

She snorted. "Remind me to ignore it the next time it calls."

"My pleasure." He pulled her fully into his arms and held her tightly, hoping his actions would be able to tell her everything he hadn't been able to say. Hopefully soon the time would come when he could bare his soul to her, but for now, a hug was enough.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

The Reason - chapter 2

**ooooooooooooo**

Anders lay on his bunk, hands behind his head, listening to his roommates bickering good-naturedly about being in each other's 'space'. A knock at the hatch suddenly stilled all conversation. He sat up quickly.

"Come in," he called. He scanned the faces of the people around him. Fear was the most predominant emotion written on most of them. He wasn't surprised - they were all pretty jittery given the circumstances they'd lived in for the past half year. Truth be told, he felt a tightening in his stomach as the hatch swung open, but he was the leader of this ragtag group, and a leader had to be strong and show no fear. He stood up to bravely greet whatever was to come. _Kara would never let them hurt us, _he thought confidently.

"Samuel Anders?" the armed guard asked, looking directly at him.

"Yes," he answered.

"I'm here to escort you to the Admiral's quarters."

"Okay. Hold tight till I get back everyone." There were nods of assent but he noticed the fearful looks were still present.

He wondered as they walked Galactica's corridors, if anyone else was to be privy to this meeting. _It would be nice if Kara were there, _he thought, but somehow he didn't think it would be likely. Despite Kara's assertions that Anders and his people were to be trusted, he felt the Admiral still had suspicions. They were confirmed as he was ushered into Adama's quarters. The distrustful look was still firmly in place on the Admiral's face, and the armed guard stood just inside the door, gun at the ready.

"Are you a cylon?" were Adama's opening words.

Anders stood in stunned silence for a moment. "Do you really expect me to say yes if I am?" he threw back, a half-smile on his face.

"I really don't know what to expect."

"Kara trusts me, isn't that enough?"

"You may have fooled her too. It wouldn't be the first time one of _them _has had us completely fooled," Adama said bitterly.

Anders regarded him for a moment before answering, seeing the sudden flash of emotion and the equallly fast removal of it on Adama's face.

"I'm human and so are all of my people. I'd stake my life on it."

"You may have to. But though I'm tempted to trust Kara's judgment, I don't dare. I'm going to need each of you to give a blood sample for analysis."

"Why ...?"

"We have a method of detecting cylons. Or at least, maybe we do ... we've a doctor working on it. Plus, we have a cylon in custody now whose blood we can use as a comparison sample."

Anders brow furrowed and an irritated look crossed his face.

"Don't feel bad son, everyone in the fleet is being tested, starting with all of us on Galactica. You're in good company."

"Well, whatever's necessary," Anders said, face clearing and resuming it's usual cheerful look.

"Now, we need to talk about everything that's happened to you since the cylon attack - up to and including your time with Kara."

Anders smirked involuntarily. "Do you really need to know _everything_?"

"The explicit details I can do without. But she's barely said two words about her time there and that leads me to believe there's a lot to tell."

Anders nodded, a growing respect for Adama evident in his frank blue eyes. "I don't know the whole story," he admitted, "but I'll tell you what she told me."

Adama listened as Anders told his tale, a growing respect and liking for the young man beginning to sprout. _I really hope he doesn't turn out to be a cylon, _he thought. _Kara doesn't need to have her heart broken again._

**oooooooooooooooooo**

Kara strode purposefully towards the hangar bay, intent on making herself useful. She knew Anders and Adama were meeting and had hoped she'd be there too, but having not been invited, she couldn't very well barge in and join them. So she figured she'd immerse herself in some mechanical repair work - that always had a way of occupying her mind when she was distracted.

A set of hurried footsteps behind her caught her attention and she turned to see who it was. Lee. He was still wearing that icy-cold expression, and it sent chills down her spine. He'd _never _looked at her that way before.

"So, I guess you kept yourself _busy_ on Caprica, eh?"

"Mm," she replied, refusing to be baited.

"Wasn't as hard on you as we all thought, now was it?"

"You got something you wanna say to me?" she hissed through clenched teeth.

"Why? Why did you do it kara? Why sleep with a guy you hardly know - he could be a cylon for frak's sake!"

She whirled angrily to face him. "In case you didn't get the message the last time we had this conversation, _I don't like being called a slut!_ My personal life is neither yours nor anyone else's business! And you're the _last _ person who should be making insinuations about _my _sex life!"

His eyes narrowed. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"I know about you and Shevon."

He paled visibly, and took a step back as if she'd slapped him. "What? How ...?"

"You know Lee, that really takes the cake. You have the nerve to call _me _a slut, and all the while you've been paying a prostitute to sleep with you."

"How did you find out?" he demanded angrily.

Her expression softened slightly. "I was worried about you. You haven't been yourself since your little 'spacewalk'. You've been unaccountably missing for hours on end, late for shifts, distracted all the time - you were even gone an entire night. Yes," she said in answer to his querying look, "I do pay attention. I noticed you never slept in your bunk. So I did a little digging and kept an eye on you."

"Happy you found out about my pathetic little secret?" he asked bitterly.

"That was never the point Lee. I was worried you might ... hurt yourself. Or someone else. I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"How long have you known?" His head hung in embarrassment.

"Week or so," she admitted.

"I can only imagine what you must think of me now," he whispered.

"Lee," she said reprovingly, but still he stared at the ground. "Lee, nothing could change my opinion of you." He looked up at her, eyes dark with sorrow. "We all have needs - physical, emotional, spiritual ... Considering the harshness of the life we live, we have to take whatever shreds of happiness we can. You're only human Lee, you need love and intimacy just like the rest of us. I know I can't fully understand everything you're going through, but I've got some idea of how hard it must be for you, being who you are, and what you represent to the rest of us. It's not as easy for you to find someone and have a relationship here where your every move is scrutinized. I don't blame you at all for what you did."

Lee smiled weakly. "I don't understand how you can be okay with this. I mean, if the situation were reversed, I'd ..."

"That's because there's one big difference between us," she interrupted. "I don't judge people."

His gaze dropped to the deck shamefully again. Kara put her hand on his shoulder gently. "I'm your friend Lee, and I always will be. You know you can count on me if you need someone."

Lee pulled her into his arms and held her tightly. "Thanks," he whispered.

"Any time Lee. Any time."

**ooooooooooooooooooo**

"So tell me, how did you manage to get a cylon ship and fly it here? Have you flight experience?" Anders wasn't sure, but he thought he detected a note of hopefulness in that last sentence.

"Well, we reused Kara's plan on the next airstrip we found - not surprisingly they didn't use the one we originally stole from again. It worked like a charm though and I was pleasantly surprised to find it wasn't as hard to operate as I'd thought it would be. She told us the ships were biologically piloted, but she was wrong about the bigger ones. I guess they're meant for moving humanoid cylons because they had fairly normal controls."

"And you figured out how to fly it? That's hard to believe." The distrustful expression was back.

"Not before nearly crashing half a dozen times," Anders said ruefully. "I was sure we were going to die there. Honestly, I think the only reason I was able to fly it was because I was an ace video-game player. I always loved the flight simulator games and I guess that came in handy."

"That's a pretty flimsy explanation."

Anders shrugged. "I know, but it's the best one I've got. It took me quite a while to figure out how to fly it smoothly. There wasn't a soul on board who wasn't puking their guts out for quite a long time." He grinned apologetically.

"Another interesting question is how you found us."

"How we found you?"

"Space is large. _Very _large. How did you manage to look in just the right place? You could have been searching the rest of your life and not found us."

"That was pure luck. We fiddled with the controls till we figured out how to set the jump drive and then set it to jump as far as it was able to go. Didn't really have any idea which direction to go, so we just picked one and went. Then we picked up a homing beacon - faint but we followed it till we saw a huge fleet of ships. It was either you, or it was them, in which case we were already as good as dead, so we just said to hell with it and took a chance."

"Homing beacon? A _homing beacon_ led you to us? My gods ..." Adama stood up and strode to the phone. "This is the Admiral. Captain Adama, Lieutenant Thrace and Mr. Gaeta to the conference room _immediately!_" He put down the phone. "Come with me," he said brusquely, striding out of his quarters. Anders followed, the armed marine at his side.

Lee, Kara and Gaeta were already there when they arrived a few minutes later. Lee took one look at his father's worried face and knew something was terribly wrong. "What's the matter dad?" he asked, concern furrowing his brow.

"We have a problem. A _big _problem."

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

The Reason - chapter 3

**oooooooooooooooo**

He explained the situation to them quickly, noting the surprise on their faces. "We may not have much time - we've got to find the beacon - and figure out who sent it out. In the meanwhile, we'll need to beef up security in case the cylons have picked up our signal. Lee, Kara, I'm going to need the two of you back on Pegasus." He held up a hand to shush their protests.

"Pegasus?" Anders queried, finally joining in the conversation.

"Another battlestar," Kara explained. "Do we _have _to sir?" she asked, a painfully pathetic look on her face.

"I need people I can trust there. Pegasus has to be an extension of Galactica - ready to follow any order I give unquestioningly. Lee, I'm going to need you to take command of her." Lee's eyes widened. "I don't know Jamison well enough to trust him implicity."

Lee and Kara looked at each other knowingly. Things had been in turmoil on the Pegasus since both Cain and Fiske had been murdered. Lee and Kara had asked to be transferred back to Galactica and Adama had granted it gladly, having missed his two favourite people; returning them to their previous ranks. But that was when they thought the immediate cylon threat had been neutralized.

"Kara, I need you to resume the CAG's position - you will co-ordinate both ship's air groups. I'll put Helo in charge here. Mr. Gaeta - I need you and Dee to co-ordinate a search of all the ships in the fleet, starting with this one. As of now, we're on condition two throughout the fleet."

Surprised though they were, Lee and Kara were seasoned officers and they were ready to follow orders. "Yes sir," they both said together, then smiled at one another.

"Um ... what about me?" Anders asked tentatively.

"You will be escorted back to your quarters where you will remain until further notice."

"Couldn't I go with Kara? I'm sure I could be of some help ..."

"I'm sorry. Until you've been cleared and until this potential threat has been taken care of ... I can't trust you. Much as I _want _ to believe your story, you have to admit it's awfully suspicious."

"Admiral," Kara protested. "He's not one of them - I know it."

"_Captain_," Adama said forcefully. "You have your orders. You and _Commander _Adama need to get to Pegasus _now_."

"Yes sir," she said, visibly deflating. She and Lee began to head for the door, but Anders grabbed her hand for a moment.

"Be safe," he whispered, echoing his words to her as she left Caprica, and giving her a little smile. She threw him a sad look and pulled her hand away.

"See you soon," she mouthed, and he nodded, the marine nudging him to follow her. Gaeta headed out as well, and Adama was left to ponder what he'd just seen. He sighed and headed for CIC.

"Frak me," was Tigh's colourful choice of words when Adama filled him in on the situation. He set condition two throughout the fleet and prepared himself for battle.

"Oh, and Colonel," Adama added, "double the security detail for our guests."

"You think they had something to do with this?" Tigh asked quietly.

"Perhaps, but even if not, they may have been the bait to lead the cylons to us. At this point I'm not ruling _anything_ out."

**ooooooooooooooooooo**

"I hate being on that ship," Kara complained as she and Lee flew a raptor towards Pegasus shortly after their meeting with Adama had ended. Lee just shrugged.

"What, you _like_ it?"

"Doesn't matter now does it? We don't have a choice," he said tonelessly.

"Oh no you don't," Kara said warningly. "Don't you do that again. Talk to me frakhead."

Lee smiled in spite of himself. "That's _Commander_ frakhead to you, _Captain._ I still outrank you, you know."

"Probably always will. The military tends not to promote people who call their superiors frakhead."

Lee chuckled. "Oh, so you've noticed that have you?" Kara just stuck out her tongue at him. "Now that _I'm _ in charge, I'll warn you to stow that foul mouth of yours. I can't even throw you in hack if you cross me."

"I'm beginning to see an upside to this assignment." Kara smiled.

**ooooooooooooooooooooo**

"You've gotta be kidding!"

"Blood samples?"

"I can't believe they think we're cylons!"

"Stupid frakking military."

Anders sat down heavily on his bunk and sighed, preparing to wait out the verbal storm. He'd known when he'd told the others about the blood samples that they would be up in arms. But he figured it was easier to let them have their blow up first, then discuss it later.

"They don't frakking trust us!"

"Well, why should they?" Anders piped up. "How do _they_ know we are who we say we are? Weren't we just as suspicious when someone new turned up on _our _territory? We just show up out of nowhere and expect them to take us at face value." Silence. "Let's just go along with it and cause no trouble. The sooner we get it over with, the happier we'll all be."

There was grudging acceptance to his comments, but at least there was agreement. Anders lay back in his bunk, finally allowing his thoughts to drift, now that his people were taken care of. Kara ... He felt his heart being pulled apart at the thought of her, boldly heading into danger without him. _ She's a tough woman, none tougher - you know that Sam. If _anyone _ can handle it, she can._

But he couldn't stop the churning feeling in his stomach. He'd failed Kara once on Caprica when he'd left her to die out in the forest after the ambush, _It wasn't your fault - she never blamed you for that, _and he'd sooner die than fail her again. He desperately wanted to be by her side, watching her back, making sure she was safe. _I love her_. The thought came unbidden, but as he thought about it, he realized it was true. How could it be possible to love someone you only knew a few days, week tops? He had no idea, but he knew deep inside that Kara was the woman for him.

She'd amazed him with her bravery - amused him with her loud, aggressive behaviour, and touched him with her vulnerability - something he suspected she didn't let many people see. He felt privileged that she'd shown that side of herself to him. He felt in his pocket and pulled out the dogtag she'd given him as she'd left Caprica. At first he hadn't wanted to take it, but after she left, barely moments after, he was glad she'd insisted. He'd kept it close to him since she'd gone, and had held it in his hand every night as he went to sleep, praying she'd make it back to her ship alive and return for him like she said she would.

_What is up with you Sam? You've never been affected by a woman like this before - love 'em and leave 'em was your motto - you had groupies by the dozen and not one of them ever caused you to feel this way. Maybe the reason she touched your heart like no one else is because you're more similar than you know - maybe she too is one who plays her cards close to her chest, never letting anyone in, but finding it a lonely life. Maybe the both of you are afraid of letting people get too close - afraid of getting hurt. It's easier to just keep the world at arm's length and never care too deeply for anyone or anything. Maybe you're just kindred souls._

But whatever it was, Anders knew that he loved her. He'd admitted it to himself now. Whether or not he could admit it to her was another story. _She probably isn't ready for something that serious anyway. Maybe it's best just not to say anything yet._ Somehow he had a feeling that it was going to be more difficult than that though. He may never say the words to her, but his actions would proclaim it loud and clear, and she was no dummy. _Well, you'll just have to cross that bridge when you get to it, _he told himself. _That is, assuming she survives that long ..._

He wasn't a particularly religious man, though he did believe in the gods, but now he closed his eyes and prayed silently for her.

**oooooooooooooooooo**

"Report Mr. Gaeta," Adama said, as Gaeta entered CIC.

"Nothing sir. We've gone over this ship with a fine tooth comb - not a thing."

"Well, that's good news at least. But the bad news is, it has to be _somewhere_. We have to find it. Dee - let me know the minute you hear anything from the other ships." Dee nodded.

Adama paced. When he paced, the whole atmosphere in CIC was tense. Not that it wasn't anyway, given the situation, but when Adama paced, it was even more tense. Tigh watched him, almost able to read his friend's mind. They'd worked together enough years to know each other inside and out. Bill was worried - not just for the safety of the fleet - but for his children too. Tigh himself always thought of Starbuck as one of Bill's children - he treated her like a daughter - hell, had almost been his daughter-in-law, and he knew Bill considered her one of his own, as much as Lee.

His thoughts were proven as Adama demanded to be put through to Pegasus.

"Pegasus, Galactica actual requesting to speak to Pegasus actual." Dee waited a moment. "Here you are sir."

"Commander?" Adama said, feeling the unfamiliar word roll off his tongue. Lee, a Commander. He'd always assumed one day it would happen - Lee had climbed the rank ladder very quickly and everyone assumed he'd just keep going till he hit the top. They hadn't suspected it would happen so quickly though.

"Admiral, any news?" Lee asked.

"Galactica is clean. The rest of the ships are being scoured as we speak. Any news of Pegasus?"

"Things are running smoothly here, but no news on the beacon. We're not quite finished the search though. I'll let you know the minute it's done."

"Thank you Commander. Good work." Adama found it hard to give praise, especially to his son, but since nearly losing him he'd realized it was time he let go of the 'tough dad' image and told his son what was in his heart. It was what Lee needed to hear, and what Adama himself needed to get out.

"Thank you Admiral." The words were formal, but Adama could hear Lee's pleasure in his father's praise. A small smile came to his lips. _I love you son,_ he thought. _Be safe._

"Galactica actual out."

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

The Reason - chapter 4

**oooooooooooooo**

Kara was both excited and disappointed. She was excited beyond belief that Anders had found his way to her, but now that she was stuck on Pegasus, it was as though he was as unreachable as ever. She worked with a zeal Lee had never seen before - pushing herself and her people to the limit in order to get the mission complete so she could go back. _Not that there's much I can do, _she thought. _I'm just the frakking CAG around here - not one of the people searching for the source of the transmission._

But she searched the hangar bays and all the ships tirelessly and pushed everyone into many more rotations than they were used to in order to keep the fleet defended. The search continued on for several days. Pegasus had been cleared, as had every other ship searched, but there were still a few left to go.

Lee walked into the CAG's office, hoping to find Kara so he could have a few words with her. Fortunately, she was between rotations and _was _there, but having just showered, she was in the sleeping area of the quarters, only partially dressed.

"Kara?" he called out tentatively, rounding the corner and stopping dead as he caught sight of her, clad only in a black sports bra and matching underwear. Her hair was still wet and Lee watched as droplets of water spilled down her nearly naked back. Then she turned around.

"Hey," she said neutrally, face unreadable. Having Lee catch her in her underwear was nothing new, and it didn't embarrass her in the slightest.

"I was wondering if we could talk."

She nodded briefly. "Sure."

"You ah ... might want to finish dressing first," he said, an amused expression on his face.

"Why? You don't like me in in my underwear?" she teased, big pout on her face. "Might hurt my ego."

"Whether or not I _like _it isn't the point. I really don't need one of the crew coming to see you and finding us having a chat while you're nearly naked."

"Spoilsport," she said, pulling on her uniform.

_Frak, that's better, _Lee thought. _It is so hard to concentrate while looking at her in that!_ They wandered into the office area, Kara running her fingers through her hair in an attempt to comb it. "So, what's up?" she began, sitting behind her desk and putting her feet up.

"You're pushing everyone too hard." She gave him a 'what the hell are you talking about?' look. "People are complaining Kara. Complaining to _me._"

"Why don't they come to me then?"

"Probably because they're terrified of you." She smirked. "Yes, I know you like it that way, but when the crew complains, I have to do something about it."

"I thought that was the XO's job."

"It is, but he's just as terrified of you as they are."

Kara laughed out loud and Lee couldn't help but smile. "It isn't funny Kara. I've checked the schedules. You _are_ working them too hard. We're going to have burnouts soon at this rate."

She suddenly became serious. "I thought the whole point was for us to find the frakking beacon as fast as possible and make sure the fleet is well-defended till we do. And it is."

"That isn't what this urgency is _really _about, now is it?"

Her eyes narrowed and she swung her feet off the desk. "What do you mean?"

He stepped closer, leaning over the desk. "You want to get back to Galactica - to Anders. You can't stand being away can you? So you're pushing yourself hard to make sure you don't think about him. But you're pushing _everyone,_ not just yourself."

"Don't try to analyze me Lee, you don't know anything about me." Her stare was venomous.

"Oh I don't do I?" Lee advanced on her, and the look on his face was predatory. His eyes bored into her like lasers. Kara stood up and backed away as he advanced. Her heart pounded - Lee had never acted like this with her before. Soon he had her pinned against the wall, heavily muscled arms holding her in place.

"Lee," she said dangerously, but suddenly his lips were on hers, fierce and demanding. She tried to protest, at least for a few seconds, then her arms slipped up around his neck and twined in his hair.

Lee felt a sudden fire ignite in him as she began to respond, but just as suddenly, she pulled her arms back to his chest and gave him a shove. They stood, facing one another, breathing heavily in each other's faces.

"So, I don't know anything about you huh?" Lee said spitefully. Kara said nothing but continued to stare angrily at him. "Kara," he went on, a note of pleading entering his voice. "Isn't there _any _chance for us ..."

"That's just great Lee!" Kara exploded, pushing him out of the way and striding across the room. She whirled angrily, hands on her hips. "_Now _you decide to act. You waffle around for months, pretending you don't have feelings for me, and suddenly decide it's time now that I've found someone else? Well it's too late! Too damn late for that Lee Adama!"

His face fell. "Right. I get it." He turned to leave. "Just try not to kill anyone from overwork, okay?"

"Lee." He stopped at the threshold, hearing Kara's footsteps behind him. "I'm sorry."

He swung around. "Sorry for what?" he challenged, not letting her off easy.

"Sorry for yelling at you. Sorry for ... gods Lee, you know I _do _care for you but ..." He waited, making her continue. "If the circumstances were different ... if we didn't have all the history we have ... " She put a hand out and touched his cheek gently. "If it was just us, nothing more, I wouldn't hesitate for a second. But even thinking about being with you?" She shook her head. "Every time I look into your eyes, I see Zack. I just can't do it Lee, I can't betray Zack like that."

Lee's expression softened as he saw tears come into her eyes at the memory of his brother.

"Anders reminds me of you - you both have the same sense of duty and loyalty, the same devotion to the people you care about. He's a good man Lee, just like you are. But he's _not _you. He's _not _Zack's brother. I can be with him without all the guilt. I can be happy with him. Will you let me?" She paused, one tear finding it's way down her cheek. "We're friends aren't we? Can't you be happy for me?"

Lee was moved by the vulnerability he saw in her face and heard in her words. He took her hands in his. "Of course we're friends. Never doubt that. And I _am _happy for you. It's just ..." He looked away over her shoulder.

"I know. I wish too. But we can't, you know we can't."

"I know," he sighed. "And I'll try to be happy for you. You deserve to be happy Kara."

"So do you," she whispered. "It just can't be with me."

Lee squeezed her hands and smiled weakly. "It'll be over soon and you can go back to Galactica to be with him. Just try to take it easy on the pilots till then, okay?"

"Okay. And Lee, thank you." She leaned forward impulsively and kissed him, a sweet, soft kiss, full of genuine affection.

Lee pulled away a moment later, before his baser instincts took over and he pulled her into his arms fiercely and never let her go. "I've got to get back to work," he said, a little breathlessly.

"Yes Commander," she replied, smiling sadly as he walked out of her office.

**ooooooooooooooooooo**

Later, after her shift, as she lay in her bunk, the tears spilled hotly down her cheeks. _Why? Why Lee? Why did you do this to me? Why couldn't you have told me months ago, before I met Sam? Maybe I could have tried to push the guilt aside and go for it. I love you Lee, I only wish I _could _ love you. _The tears continued to fall even as her thoughts turned to Anders. She wondered, for the first time, if she only allowed herself to fall for him because she wanted to forget about Lee. _No, that couldn't be. I love him, I do, really. He _is _a good man, like I told Lee, and I really _do _love him. _And her tears for Lee and Anders mingled, even as their two faces merged in her mind. Blue eyes - two sets of blue eyes, piercing into her soul.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

The Reason - chapter 5

**oooooooooooooooo**

"Starbuck - the beacon has been found on the Aquarion Compaion. I'm sending a squad of marines. Get some backup in the air in case we have to destroy it!" Adama said urgently.

"Yes sir. Galactica's closer - launch your alert Vipers. I'll send my best. ETA, three minutes."

"Copy that Starbuck." He hit the dial to switch to intercom. "Launch the alert Vipers."

Back on the Pegasus bridge, Kara too was switching to intercom. "Apollo to the launch bay immediately. Emergency take off in two minutes." She raced out of CIC towards the flight bay, already pulling off her uniform. _Thank the gods I always keep my flightsuit with my Viper!_ She was out of breath when she arrived a scant thirty seconds later. Lee came charging in from the other side of the bay.

"Beacon's been found," she explained, pulling on her flightsuit. "Aquarion Companion. Galactica's alert Vipers are meeting us there."

"Let's go," Lee said, all business.

They sped towards their target, meeting a group of six other Vipers nearby.

"Hey guys, Apollo and Starbuck joining you," Kara said, the smile on her face evident in her tone of voice. It was good to be back among friends.

"Hey guys, glad to see you. We'll follow your lead Starbuck," Helo said.

"We're only here as backup. Marines have been sent in to neutralize the beacon. Let's hope things don't get ugly."

"Copy that Starbuck."

"Everyone fan out. Let's get all the angles covered." Lee nodded, though no one could see him. He had to admit, she _was _a good CAG. _No doubt thanks to my training, _he thought, a large smirk on his face.

"Galactica, Starbuck. We're in position."

"Starbuck, Galactica. Hold positions. Raptor two with the marine contingent moving in."

"Copy that Galactica."

There were a few minutes of comm silence, and eight hearts pounded painfully as they waited for instructions.

"Starbuck, Galactica actual. The beacon has been successfully removed but we've found another cylon aboard. The marines have taken him into custody and are bringing him back here."

"Yes sir, we'll escort Raptor two in."

"Thank you Starbuck."

"Hey Starbuck what's going on?" Helo asked. It was the most frustrating part of the comm system. When the Commander was on personally, only the person he was talking to could hear him, but the rest of the squadron could hear the pilot's responses.

"Seems Galactica's going to have another visitor in the brig."

"Oh frak - there was a cylon on board?" Lee swore.

"Yup. He's under control now, but you know how quickly things can get out of control when one of _them _is around."

"Starbuck," Helo said warningly.

"Sorry Helo. Sometimes I forget." She paused a minute. "I don't think of her as one of them. I know she is, but I just can't let go of the thought that she's Sharon."

There was silence for a few moments then Lee broke it. "Starbuck, the Raptor's on it's way out of the launch bay."

"Copy that. Apollo, you and I will escort our visitor home. The rest of you stay here and keep an eye out for trouble."

"Got it covered Starbuck," Helo answered. "Good luck."

"You too Helo."

**oooooooooooooooo**

Lee and Kara landed their Vipers several minutes later, noting the large security detail Adama had ordered. He himself was there, along with two squads of marines, and as Lee and Kara exited their ships, he nodded almost imperceptibly for them to join him. They did immediately and stood flanking him as the Raptor's hatch hissed open.

"Thank you," he murmured, and both of them nodded, happy to be back.

Three marines exited the Raptor first, guns drawn and faces solemn. Then _he _stepped into view. The cylon - dark-skinned and dark-eyed - a copy of the one Kara had met on Caprica - Simon.

Kara paled and took a step back involuntarily. "Frak me," she whispered.

Lee glanced at her briefly, noting her discomfiture, before turning his attention to the man in front of him. His hand tightened on his sidearm, muscles tensed. In the silence he could hear the cocking of multiple rifles.

The cylon's dark eyes searched the room quickly and rested on Kara. A slow smile spread across his face. "Hello Starbuck. We meet again." His deep voice was unnerving to Kara.

The marines on either side of him grabbed his arms and propelled him forwards while three more followed, guns trained on his back. As he walked, his head turned gradually to the side, eyes never leaving Kara's. Lee looked over to make sure she was okay, only to find her eyes glued to his, an expression of fierce anger in them that he'd never seen before.

After he'd been led out of the hangar bay towards the brig, the remaining marines fell back and left the two Adamas and Kara alone. Kara's breathing was shallow and rapid, showing that she was afraid, despite the angry look on her face.

"Starbuck," Lee said softly. "Are you okay?" She drew herself up proudly, taking a deep breath to steady herself. She nodded.

"Caprica?" Adama asked, always a man of few words.

She nodded again, tears beginning to form in her eyes. Lee's heart went out to her. He recalled her eerily vacant look when she'd returned from Caprica, and though he'd offered, she hadn't shared any of the horrors she'd experienced with him. Obviously the pain hadn't lessened any in the weeks since she'd been back.

Adama saw how affected she was emotionally, and he took her hand in his and squeezed it gently. "Come, let's get to CIC and check on the fleet's status." Lee and Kara both nodded and the three of them walked side by side out of the hangar bay.

**oooooooooooooooooo**

"Starbuck, you're not supposed to ask the Commander of a ship to leave his post."

Kara coloured. "Sorry sir. I ... forgot Lee was in command. I just instinctively called for my best pilot."

Adama's face softened a little. "I guess this is new territory for all of us. Just make sure you remember next time."

"I hope there isn't a next time."

"You and me both," Lee put in, as he entered Adama's quaraters. "I'm not sure I like command."

Adama's eyebrows raised. "Really? You do a great job as CAG."

"That's different. I'm only in charge of the _pilots_, not the entire ship.

"I see." It was obvious to both Lee and Kara that he really wasn't interested in discussing it further. "Kara, I need you to tell me about the cylon."

She looked around the room uncomfortably but said nothing.

"I know it's hard, but you have to tell me everything that happened on Caprica."

She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose. Then she took a deep breath and began to speak. "He called himself Simon. He's the one who repaired my gunshot wound."

"Why would he do that? Why not just let you die?" Lee asked curiously.

"Apparently I have a 'destiny.' He told me that and so did Sharon. I had no idea what he meant, but it became pretty clear when he started hounding me about having children. Told me that having babies - increasing humanity was more important than anything." Her face took on a haunted look. "The next morning I woke up and there was a new scar here." She pointed at her lower belly. "I asked him what he did to me - I figured it wasn't good if they didn't even bother to ask my permission. _He _said I had internal bleeding that needed to be fixed, but I knew." She hook her head, fighting tears. "I _knew _he was a cylon and that they were trying to use me ..." She couldn't continue, but it didn't matter. The two men knew exactly twhat she was talking about judging from the looks on their faces.

"Kara," Adama said gently. "I'm so sorry."

"I killed him. I killed him and tried to escape." She turned away from them and stared at the wall. "There were hundreds - women hooked up to machines and impregnated with cylon babies. I felt sick to my stomach knowing what they were doing to us - knowing I could have been one of them."

Lee walked up beside her and put an arm around her shoulder. "It's okay - you got away. You're safe now."

She turned a sad face towards him. "I'll never be safe. Sharon said they know who I am and that they need me to fulfil a special destiny." She took a deep breath. "They'll never stop hunting me. I'll never be safe as long as they're still alive."

Adama took a step forward so he was close in front of her. "You know we'll never let them get you Kara. You'll be safe so long as you stay here."

"I doubt if anyone can guarantee that, but the thought makes me feel better." She smiled weakly.

Lee squeezed her shoulder but said nothing.

"Have you ... cleared Sam yet? Can I see him?" she asked hopefully. Lee removed his arm and took a step back. _She's turning to him for comfort now. Used to be she turned to me when she needed someone. I guess she doesn't need me anymore,_ he thought sadly.

"He's been cleared, but not all of his people are. They're staying under guard till then."

"Please, may I see him?" Kara pleaded.

Adama sighed. He didn't have the heart to hurt her further. "He can leave, but the rest of them must stay. And," he added, looking directly at her, "he's not to roam this ship under _any _circumstances. Either he's in his quarters under guard or he's under your supervision. If anything happens while he's out, I'm holding you responsible."

"I understand sir," Kara said, a light beginning to shine in her eyes.

"Dismissed."

"Yes sir. Thank you sir." Kara exited quickly, a spring in her step that had been missing the past few days.

Adama turned his attention to his son. If a light had gone on in Kara at the thought of being with Anders, it had gone out of Lee. his eyes were dark and sad, and his body language screamed defeat. He didn't know what to say so he just put a comforting hand on Lee's shoulder.

Lee tried to smile. "I'll be getting back to work then."

"I'll see you for dinner Lee," Adama said.

"I'll be here," Lee said, pulling the hatch closed behind him. He walked down the corridors towards his office, trying to muster the energy to do anything. Wasn't really working though - all he wanted to do was hit his rack and just lie there. _No, Kara will probably be there with him - bad idea Lee._

He turned a corner and bumped into someone. "Oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention ..." He stopped dead. It was Dee. Lately every time he bumped into her, either literally or figuratively, there was an uncomfortable tension in the air.

"Hi Lee." She smiled shyly at him. Then her face became serious. "Is something wrong?"

Lee smiled and his spirits lifted. Just being with her made him feel better. "Just having a bad day," he said cheerfully.

"Do you ... need help making it better?" she offered tentatively.

He cocked his head sideways and his smile grew wider. "You're already helping."

"Can I help later? If ... if you have time that is," she said, blushing slightly.

"My dad expects me for dinner, but I have a few hours free after that before CAP."

"I'll met you at his quarters at 17:00 then."

"I'm looking forward to it." And he was. For the first time in a long time he had something positive to look forward to. And it lifted his spirits immensely.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

The Reason - chapter 6

A/N : Just wanted to let you know, this chapter might be disturbing to some - it's definitely rated M. A reminder though - this is NOT a Kara/Lee story so be warned before you read.

**oooooooooooooo**

Kara opened her eyes, blinking in the dim light. For a moment she forgot where she was, but even without light she recognized her bunk on Galactica. There was no mistaking that lumpy mattress! She rolled over, trying to get comfortable and realized she was sharing her bed with someone. She smiled when she remembered - Sam. They'd had a very ... physical reunion after Adama had cleared him. She'd taken him to her bed and they'd made love for hours - quick and passionate like it had been on Caprica, then slow and langorous, till she was begging him for release. It had been amazing - she'd never come so many times in one night before, not even with Zack, and he'd been pretty damn good at pleasing her.

She cuddled up to his naked chest and threw an arm around him, inhaling his scent deeply. He still smelled of Caprica - sun and fresh air and just a trace of radiation. Obviously they hadn't allowed him to shower yet. She planned on changing that in the morning. If he had to be escorted _everywhere _by her personally, so be it. No one could complain about them showering together. She chuckled quietly at the thought.

"What?" he murmured in a low voice.

"Just thinking," she whispered, playing with the hair on his chest.

"About me?"

She smacked him lightly. "What an ego you've got."

He lifted his head up to look at her in the dim light. "After last night I should _hope _you'd be thinking of me," he smirked.

"I am, trust me, I am," she assured him, crawling on top of him and kissing him passionately.

"Well, that's better," he said, his low sexy voice sending a thrill through her body the way it always did. She shivered, body anticipating the pleasure to come. "You think so, do you?" he teased, hands roaming over her back and ending up cupping her naked bottom.

"I ... know ... so ..." she answered, punctuating her reply with kisses down his chest as she spoke.

"Gods, I love a woman who's so passionate," he said, a smile evident in his voice, as he allowed his hands to meander, exploring all the curves of her luscious body. "Ohhh ..." he groaned as she moved down out of his grasp and began to work the lower half of his body. Her hands explored him fully, finally taking his semi-erection and closing over it lovingly as she lowered her head and began sucking him.

"Oh, gods Kara ... lords of Kobol ... Kara - so good," Sam whispered, breath coming in great gasps. She took this as a sign that he was enjoying her ministrations and so she continued enthusiastically.

Neither of them realized that their whispers and heavy breathing had roused one other occupant of the room - Lee. He hadn't exactly been sleeping well lately, and after seeing Kara and Sam's bodies, sleeping intertwined in her bunk when he'd come to bed, he'd had trouble falling asleep.

He woke to the sound of whispers and immediately turned towards them. They were coming from Kara's bunk. _Of course, _he thought, sighing heavily. His eyes weren't accustomed to the dark yet, but he could hear plainly enough, and from the sounds he was hearing, he figured things were about to get hot and heavy.

"Ohhh ... Kara ... please, don't stop," he heard, so he opened his eyes. Gods! Kara was down on him! He could just make out the shape of her body kneeling down between Sam's legs, her head raising and lowering rhythmically. He turned his head away and closed his eyes again, feeling sick to his stomach. He'd wanted so desperately for Kara to be his - every time he touched her, even accidentally, he felt a fire shoot through him. He knew - Kara was the woman for him. Unfortunately she wanted what he had to give, but from someone else. The tears pricked at the corners of his eyes.

"Kara ... please stop ... Kara ..." Sam was begging now, body writhing on the bed under her. Kara let him go and he popped out of her mouth with a great sucking noise. She crawled up so she was positioned just over him and stopped.

"You _really _want me to stop?" she teased, rubbing her hot, wet folds against him.

"Gods no! Frak me Kara - now!" He grabbed her hips and pulled her down on him and they both groaned as pleasure began to spread through them.

She moved up and down on him slowly, allowing him to calm down while still rubbing that most sensitive spot inside her every time she lowered herself. Finally her body was screaming for release, and it was all she could do to keep herself silent. Sam knew how close she was so he slipped a hand off her hip and found her centre, pressing gently as he began to circle around and around.

"Oh gods ... frak ... Sam!" she cried involuntarily as she came for the sixth time that night. Sam put his other hand over her mouth and smiled.

"Shh!" he reminded her. "This isn't Caprica - we're not alone."

_No frakking shit Sherlock, _Lee thought angrily. This had to be his worst nightmare ever - Kara frakking another man right in front of him - and he couldn't even leave or they'd know he was awake! Even death would be preferable to this.

He heard the rustle of sheets as the lovers changed position, and he involuntarily turned his head to see. It wasn't that he _wanted _to watch - gods no! - but a part of him couldn't help wanting to see Kara, naked and experiencing pleasure.

She was still astride him, but now he was sitting too, back against the upturned pillow at the head of her bed. Lee tore his eyes away - he shouldn't be watching - didn't want to see this - he wasn't a voyeur after all. But it was happening right there, not five feet away from him. _This is like a bad porno movie, _he thought sadly. _What did I ever do to deserve this kind of punishment? _he wondered.

Things moved oh-so-slowly between them now as they enjoyed playing with every sensitive spot on each other's bodies, working each other slowly back up to ecstasy. Lee couldn't help but steal a glance every now and again. _Weren't they done yet? _He'd never know it could take that long!

As things began to really heat up, Sam cupped her buttocks with one hand and let the other trail up and down her spine, pressing lightly as he reached her tailbone. She arched her body into him, her centre rubbing against him.

"Sam ... oh Sam ... hurry, please," she pleaded, wanting her climax to hold off till he was ready. But he seemed to be taking forever! _Could it be the fact that this is the third time we've made love in eight hours? _she reminded herself, trying to slow her motions down.

he began to thrust up into her harder and she could feel the heat within her expand exponentially. He began to pant hard as his body climbed towards climax. A bead of sweat dropped down the side of his face and Kara wiped it gently, leaning forward and kissing the spot where it had been.

"Kara, sweet ... my gods ... I love you Kara ... I can't live without you," he whispered seriously, gasping for breath. The hand that had been running up and down her back came up and brushed some stray locks of hair off her face. "I love you Kara, love you so much." He stopped his thrusts and leaned forward, kissing her on the lips sweetly. "You're my life - you're everything to me." He caressed her cheek. "I love you so much."

Kara felt tears pool in her eyes - she'd known he was special and that he held a special place in her heart despite the short amount of time they'd known each other. She'd never expected him to be so vocal about his feelings - obviously under the 'tough guy' exterior there was a sweet, romantic man - one who loved her and wasn't afraid to say it or show it. _Unlike Lee, _she thought. _I'm almost positive he loves me but he'll never admit it - so even if I were to wait around for him forever, it would never happen between us._

She gave herself a shake mentally - now was really _not _the time to be thinking about Lee. Besides, they were friends, nothing more. Never would be. But _this _man loved her and wanted to be with her, and though she still felt some flicker of feeling for Lee, she _did _love him too. Now it was time to let go and allow herself to show it.

"I love you Sam - I missed you so much," she whispered, tears falling down her cheeks. He wiped them with his thumb, smiling at her. He didn't need to ask why she was crying - the look on her face told him they were tears of happiness. He felt as though his heart would burst. That and something else ...

Kara felt Sam jump inside her as he began to come, exploding hot jets of liquid deep inside her. "Kara, my love ..." he rasped, ecstasy written all over his face.

"Sam .. oh ... I love you..." she choked out before her climax overwhelmed her and nothing existed but the two of them, bodies sharing pleasure back and forth together ... as one.

Lee looked up at just the wrong moment. Kara's face was angelic as she came - flushed a deep pink, cheeks wet with tears of joy, body shaking against _his. _ He rolled over and buried his face in the pillow, tears falling freely now. He'd heard, he'd seen - Kara was lost to him now. He was destined to be her 'friend ' - the most evil punishment known to mankind.

He heard more rustling as Kara and Sam pulled apart and slid under the sheets, and after tossing and turning for what seemed like an eternity, he eventually fell into a fitful sleep again.

**oooooooooooooooooooo**

When Lee awoke in the morning, Kara and Sam were already gone. He noticed the sheets on her bed were still rumpled beyond belief and decided it was time he found himself another place to sleep. He couldn't bear to listen to them make love every night, and there were many empty beds in other bunkrooms.

He forced a smile to his face and headed out into the corridor to begin his day, and the first familiar face he ran into was Dee's in the mess hall. She smiled brightly at him and he felt the black cloud above his head lift just a fraction. He got his meal and went to join her.

She scrutinized him carefully. "You look tired. Didn't sleep well?" she asked kindly.

"No," he nodded his head meaningfully towards Kara and Sam, sitting at another table. "Kept me awake most of the night, if you know what I mean."

"Oh," she said, understanding dawning. She smiled sympathetically and placed a hand gently on his. "I had a really nice time last night."

Lee looked at her, really looked for the first time. She had a kind face from which caring and understanding emanated. She really _was _concerned for him, and it surprised him. He assessed her briefly - dark skin, dark hair, emerald-green eyes, slim, lithe body - she wasn't like Kara at all. _And you know what Lee? _he told himself. _That's a good thing - a very good thing. Kara has moved on and found happiness with someone else. Now it's your turn._

He finished off his breakfast and smiled at her. "So did I. Let's do it again, okay?" She nodded, smiling, and Lee leaned over the table impulsively and kissed her ... on the lips. He looked over at Kara and Sam, hands intertwined, glowing faces smiling at each other. Now he had a reason to move forward with Dee. Kara was happy - now it was his turn.

**THE END**

**A/N #2 - Thanks so much for reading this - especially all you Kara/Lee shippers. Keep in mind, I still love Kara/Lee and hope and pray that they will end up together on the show, I was just exploring a different possibility here. Doesn't mean I'll stop writing Kara/Lee stories - heavens forbid! Thanks for all the kind reviews too - I really appreciate the feedback.**

**Tracy :)**


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